Ep. 88 Sex and intimacy with Clio Wood

[soundcloud url="https://api.soundcloud.com/tracks/744423673?secret_token=s-KKFca" params="color=#ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true" width="100%" height="166" iframe="true" /]

Giving birth is an incredible event yet the recovery from childbirth can take weeks or even months. Many changes occur along the way and one of these could be the relationship between you and your partner, especially in the bedroom. Unfortunately, postnatal sex is very rarely discussed and can be a real source of anxiety for couples.

In this week’s episode, &Breathe founder Clio Wood shares her personal experience and insights on how to cope and get back to pleasurable, pain-free sex postpartum. She discusses how to deal with potential resentment between yourself and your partner after childbirth and how to ease your way back in to having sex. She also shares her thoughts on women putting too much pressure on themselves and what mindset to adopt to be more positive about this change in your life.

You can download a transcript of this week’s episode here.

As always, we continue the conversation over on Instagram, so once you’ve listened to the episode, come and join me there.

Key Takeaways From This Week’s Episode:

Personal Experience

• Claire experienced a traumatic birth, in which the cord was tight around her daughter’s neck and she had to be resuscitated. (5:56)

• It took about two years to get back to regular pleasurable sex. (7:18)

• It was hard to get back to sex due to scarring. (7:40)

On Exercising the Pelvic Floor

• Squeeze to strengthen the pelvic floor but do not forget to release. (10:45)

• Consider the full spectrum. It is not just about squeezing and lifting. (27:43)

On the Relationship with the Partner

• Find other ways of being intimate aside from penetrative sex. (14:47)

• Keep sex off the agenda by hugging and cuddling instead. (15:07)

• Nonpenetrative sex could also be very satisfying for both parties without having unnecessary pressure. (26:12)

• It is essential to learn to talk to each other. (15:35)

• Consider going through couples therapy. (18:56)

Getting Back to Postnatal Sex

• Scheduling helps build intimacy and anticipation towards each other. (17:03)

• Foreplay starts the minute sex ends. (17:39)

• Sharing is vital since a lot of self-image issues for both parties are tied to the conversations around sex. (21:40)

• About 83% of women experience some painful sex problem postnatally over the first three months. This figure goes down to 60% after nine months. (22:53)

• Be honest in communicating with your partner about your sex drive. (24:43)

• Everyone has to work on their pelvic floor after childbirth to strengthen it. (33:16)

About Clio

Clio Wood is the founder of &Breathe Wellbeing, a family wellbeing company. It was established in January 2015, inspired by her childbirth and postnatal experience. They are passionate about self-care for parents, holding retreats for families in France, UK, USA and Morocco. A Cambridge University graduate, Clio used to be a headhunter and an interior designer before &Breathe.

You can reach out to Clio and find out more about &Breathe through their website and over on Instagram.